The Rules of Online Dating Etiquette

As online dating sites become more and more popular, thousands of people are still hesitant as to what to expect and what exactly is expected of themselves in return. The general rules and etiquette of dating in the offline world are taught to us at a young age, but in today's digital age, it has left many of us scratching our heads wondering what is acceptable, and what is not. Here are a few times to help you with proper online dating etiquette.

Online dating etiquette states that it is perfectly ok to be involved with more than one conversation at any given time, and that there is nothing wrong with writing emails back and forth with those that contact you. It is estimated that you will get responses from one in every four to five messages that you send out. Based on this, logic dictates that if you contact someone you are interested in knowing more about, you need not wait for them to contact you back before initiated contact with others. This same rule applies on the flipside - you may not feel inclined to write back to someone that has written to you.

It's completely reasonable that you may ignore an email should you feel that the sender isn't the right one for you. In real life, situations such as this are much more delicate to deal with and typically need an explanation as to why your not interested. In the online world, you are not breaking any online dating etiquette by simply not responding back. It may even be considered offensive to write someone and state that you do not wish to continue. However, it's a very different issue when you actually break up via emails.

Let's say, for instance, that you met someone online, went out on an actual date, but it didn't go well. You may simply send them an email stating that you do want to continue. But, you would certainly go against the online dating etiquette should you meet online, go out a few times, and then send an email ending the relationship. After a few dates, you really do owe the person an explanation for choosing not to continue. Remember to do it nicely and as friendly as you can. Of course, you may keep writing to others even while you're dating someone, as long as it has not turned serious.

It's completely against all online dating etiquette to allow your profile to be up and visible if you are getting serious with someone. You may still continue with your online membership and keep your profile open, but take it off the active and looking list. Should you not follow this basic guideline, you could actually spoil your chances of meeting the love of your life.

Many of the online dating etiquette rules refer to the general correspondence rules. Dishonesty, profanity and rudeness are completely unacceptable in all situations. Unfortunately, it is difficult for the site owners to control behavior. Heavily moderated websites will offer you better protection from offensive encounters, but typically every single online dating website have a few shady characters that will pop up at some point.

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LDS Online Dating Etiquette

There is a certain science to LDS online dating. Many may be unfamiliar with the simple procedures and rules of online dating that I will call "Online Dating Etiquette," for the sake of definition. Online dating etiquette can be very simple and in the long run save you the trouble of wasting time and offending those you've contacted through the LDS dating website you've joined. So here are some handy tips on proper online etiquette to help you land a response and a date from that special someone you've been hankering to email.

If you want to make a good first impression in your email, don't just ask, "What's up?" or the "Joey" from "Friends" inspired phrase of, "How YOU doin'?" There is no way any self-respecting LDS online dater is going to reply that. Do write a clever email, something engaging that you think someone would be compelled to write you back because of it. Make yourself sound interesting, and ask personality specific questions. Be creative; random works too.

Ok, here's a tough one. A lot of girls get a lot of email from guys, especially if the girl is seriously hot. Many times a girl will open your email and read it, but not reply because she has dozens more to open, read and reply to. So if she doesn't write you back, chances are she's not interested enough to start a conversation with you. It's ok to email again, but twice is definitely enough without a positive response. Don't be a pest and email her until she writes you back annoyed...no one likes an emailing pest. I guess this can go the other way around too; both guys and girls need to take note.

Explicit emails are never a good idea. You are on an LDS dating website! Hello?? The people on these sites are probably not going to appreciate a distasteful solicitation. I'll admit, if I get one from a guy, I get mad, not turned on.

Don't be creepy. That is obviously self-explanatory.

Be gracious. If someone writes you back saying they aren't interested, don't be offended and write an angry email back to them telling them that, "they've missed out on a good thing" and then ending the angry email calling them names. Here's a tip: not every person is going to be interested in you, and honestly it's ok. You yourself are probably not interested in everyone that emails you. Just be gracious and either write the person back with a polite, "Thank you for letting me know" or don't write back at all, both are fine.

If you live anywhere within an hour or two of each other, don't drag on the email process of contacting someone and writing back and forth without actually meeting soon after. You're on an LDS dating website for a reason, which I'm guessing is to find a date, so go on a date! I personally feel a bit frustrated and then bored with a guy I'm emailing if there is no apparent effort being made to meet. It also makes me a little suspicious of the person too. I'll start to wonder after a while when it has been month or two and I still haven't met the guy. I will start asking myself questions like, "Are his pictures really of him or is he pretending to be someone he's not?" or "What if he's married and just messing around?" It starts to get a little scary when there isn't any effort being made to meet. So meet if you feel you might have a connection sooner rather than later, but also use your instincts and be smart about whom you meet.

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